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God Abuse

By S. Njokede

Former America Secretary of State Madeleine Albright, in her book “The Mighty And The Almighty” warned citizens and countries as follows:  “ Either way, a nation that says to God, it’s all up to you, risk neglecting an obligation to act on its own behalf.”

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Supposing a belligerent country attacks Nigeria, say, for example Cameroon? I pray to dear Modesty, to forbid this my speculation. But just supposing it did happen, do we as a country, fold our arms, look skyward and wait for the Sky God to fight the bellicose foreign striker for us?

If I’m sitting in the Nigerian Senate at the moment I’d be pushing for ‘God Abuse’ Bill and make sure it is passed into law with quickstep. There are plural abuses: the child abuse, drug abuse, alcohol abuse &co.&co. People who commit these abuses are dealt with. There is no reason why those who belittle and abuse God in Nigeria should go unpunished. Charles Soludo even toyed with legislation to punish those who abuse the almighty Naira!

Those who call on God or beg Him to come and do simple tasks that humans can perform would bear the brunt of punishment of jail or fine or both, if this new legislation that is the figments of my imagination materialises.

The statements made by pastor Adeboye, governor Uduaghan and Obasanjo in abusing God in different forays buoyed up my by-now article.

 During a visit by the EFCC´s linchpin Farida Waziri, recently to him, pastor Enoch Adeboye of the Redeemed Christian Church of God prayed thus: “I feel that EFCC is of God. God is behind the reason to establish EFCC."  According Adeboye, only God can fight corruption in Nigeria. This encounter is recorded in the Leadership Newspaper of February 3 rd, 2009.

 Pastor Adeboye is left to his devices; he may continue to miseducate his passively ardent believers, like the singer Lauryn Hill, who is married to one of the Bob Marley´s sons, got miseducated in one of her album “the miseducation of Lauryn Hill.” Street-smart Nigerian; some of whom palavered and hustled their ways to Europe by land via Morocco and Spanish sea route are too hardened to buy such crap from pastor man. Educated Nigerians would assume Adeboye to be delusional. The poor who could not afford food, shelter and happiness would dismiss him as tirade man of the year. Truth is that, EFCC was birthed by Obasanjo to dehumanise his political enemies. EFCC´s creation has nothing to do with God, if actually God ever lived or lives in any place and time.

The fact that pastor Adeboye believed that God could be reduced to a corruption fighter, gave him away as someone who is living from hand to mouth socially and intellectually. That one is a straight-A student or that one has truckload of degree does not mean that one has emotional intelligence nor does it makes one to be pro-social or socio-centric. It is as stupid as it is careless to think that God and Rudolph Guiliani the former New York City mayor who fought crime to a standstill are coequals. One gets the mindset that reducing God to simple task that ordinary mortals like Guiliani can perform is to pettify God in the image of man. To ascribe to their God, ordinary responsibility which common man like Ribadu performed before he was sent schooling by Yar´Adua´s deviant underhand tactics, is the crassest stupidity ever pronounced by any living pastor.

The rate at which Nigerians call on the name of God in vain for all the wrong reasons makes my skin crawl. The other day, governor Uduaghan of Delta State was at the church giving thanks to God for making him governor. Tell me, who does know that his ex-governor cousin from Oghara-Delta State rigged Uduaghan into office? Or has his cousin who boxed him into office turned to God overnight? Movers and shakers within civil society and authority people in Nigeria have the mania for hypocrisy and sky-high deception. I wonder if they, themselves, actually believe most of the hypes they dole out for public consumption.

If actually it was God that enthroned Uduaghan as governor – then, there is devil in the details. Some people argued that Satan is not as bad as people assume. They opined that the reason God had problem with Lucifer was that Satan educated Adam and Eve to eat the forbidden fruit and free themselves from God, Who wanted them to remain primitive so that they would slave their lives away for Him to the end of time. According to them, Lucifer was the first Living thing to ever protest and also lead a revolt in history.

In the event that God actually blessed Uduaghan´s governorship like he is mouthing all over the places, one can rightly argue that God did so, so as to make Deltans slaves for the governor. Deltans ply their sorry lives between the devil and the deep blue sea each passing day under an imposed governor.  If actually God is in Uduaghans camp, and calling the shots from yonder, it would not be long before Deltans send emails and SMS messages to Lucifer to help educate them into freedom like he did with Adam and Eve. Those who are non Christian should not worry themselves over this speculation - because, the existence of our Earth predated Christianity and the Bible, which was collated by a pagan Roman emperor named Constantine the Great, in the year 325 A.D. The idea of God and Devil as it is being peddle today was the handiwork of emperor Constantine and his co-journeymen whose only interest then, was to unite plural religions and members who were raising hell in Constantine’s empire. Constantine needed to find a middle ground to unite all under one roof, so he birthed the Bible with God and Lucifer written in capital letters.

Since Lucifer liberated man from the Garden of Eden, man, had made huge progress. The leap from garden to city is no cakewalk. Any person who sees the Devils should hail him or, at least buy him a big stout beer for the useful information given man to make it from a primitive garden of nakedness into big city like Abuja. However though, none of you guys would ever see the Devil till our planet and human specie disappear like the dinosaur and dodo. The belief in God or/and Devil is just like a dream, it takes you only as far as you personally can go or anticipate.

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As Emily Dickson wrote, “faith is a fine invention/ When gentlemen can see/ But microscope are prudent / in an emergency.”

Man can rig election or set up the EFCC. It is laughable to ascribe these and other functions rendered by man to the workings of Sky God. I told you before that the devil is in the details Nigeria.

The flip side of this argument is that, had Devil not inspired man to take his destiny into his hand and free self from God’s intended enslavement forever, man, would’ve been primitively bogged down in the garden. With Suntan’s useful education to man and eventual freedom from nakedness, ignorance and God, man made it big into cities like Abuja, Asaba, Las Vegas, Paris &co.&co. Uduaghans´ election and the creation of EFCC have all to do with the Devil who inspired man to depart from primitive Garden of Eden and landed in the city. Had Devil not opened man’s understanding that paved the way for city life, Yar´Adua would not be knocking-about in Abuja committing corruption, cronyism and tribalism. Uduaghan would not have rigged election and say it is God’s work. Did I hear somebody say Amen?

If their Sky God ever lived, He would have been of higher callings than helping Nigerian political leaders to rig elections or, and wasting His time to set up EFCC in Nigeria and put Farida Waziri as the ace. Pastor Adeboye should be told that Church and State parted ways over three hundred years ago. I am quarrelling a lot with other Nigerians who call on God at every nook and corner where man could have taken his own destiny into his hands like Adam and Eve did to free themselves from primitivism of nakedness, God and ignorance. 

Listen to erstwhile president Olusegun Obasanjo “I have no regrets in my life because God has never disappointed me.” Obasanjo said that lately to purify the sinister sadism he meted Nigerians eight yearlong when he held sway. The God that stood behind OBJ to commit those profanities of no trifle measure must have been a sadomasochist God who takes pleasure in tormenting humans. The God that dysfunctioned Obasanjo´s family, made him bed his son’s wife, bankrupted his farm pre-1999 and made him race Nigeria and PDP to rock bottom eight yearlong  – that God is silly nonsense. Obasanjo is responsible for his crooked actions; he should excuse God out of his self-chosen dirty bad boy image.

Our world would have been a better place to dwell in without collective adherence to religions. A popular hip-hop song goes like this: “… religion is like prison for the seekers of wisdom…“ John Adams in one of his letters to Thomas Jefferson; said: “this would be the best of all possible worlds if there were no religion in it.” Adams and Jefferson were onetime U.S. presidents. In his song “Imagine,” John Lennon urged us to imagine a world free of religious doctrine.

Pastor Adeboye, Nigerian politicians and suchlike, should stop whipping up dogma to confuse and miseducated freeloaders and fantasist who have no mind of their own. God did not create EFCC nor did He rig or elect any politician into office. Only humans can vote and elect others.

I encourage Nigerians to be the Devil, take their destinies into their hands and free themselves from complacency, ignorance, dogma, bad leadership, belief in witchcraft and mad crave for money. If it is proven beyond reasonable doubt that God is actually behind Obasanjo plus other Nigerian politicians in their wayward ventures, we have no option other than to telephone the Devil Himself to come and mastermind our liberation from the hands of our leaders and their sadomasochistically sleazy Gods, the same way Lucifer did it with Adam and Evil into freedom.

 

S. Njokede

My email: www.punchbadleaders@yahoo.com

 

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