Date Published: 07/02/09
MOST POWERFUL MEN ALWAYS STANDUP FOR CHARMING BEAUTIES
By Farouk Martins Aresa
There are different meanings of power and beauty none of which is exclusively in the domain of men or women. The beauty of a woman has been a powerful tool throughout history and religious books. It is so tempting; it has destroyed some men. But political power has for long been mostly concentrated in men. Once men are power possessed from high position of command in terms of military, corporate, religious or political ladder, power intoxicates beauty. Though, an English king surrendered all for his wife.
We have also heard about men that are so powerful at work and at home that they look for a temporary reprieve in the hands of those who treated them as conquered, reversed role plays and dominated them to ease off pressure. There are very few ways to explain the capture of a grown matured man in the hands of a flirting lady who got him to forgo everything he had ever worked for. Call it menopause-infatuation or love.
Many politicians would do anything for the call of beauty. We have heard about Jacob Zuma of South Africa, Nigerians and their house guests in overseas mansions, strings of US Democrats and self righteous Republicans’ cling to family values. Beauties prey on the weakness of US presidential ambitions too: from 1988 Sen. Gary Hart with Donna Rice in his “monkey business” boat, to Gov. Mark Sanford with the lady from Argentina. All they could have done to ameliorate broken hearts is a second wife like Africans, with all the responsibilities it entails instead of selfish temporary series of flings, until caught.
Even the religious leaders have an eye for beautiful ladies. There was the East African Catholic Bishop who had to be reassigned to the Vatican to recue him from the firm grip of a beautiful lady. So were US evangelists Jimmy Swaggart, Jim Bakker and Ted Haggard who have looked at beautiful women beyond what they preached. Nigeria churches are full of beautiful women attracting unsuspecting souls to beauties for “deliverance”.
The biology of the sexes demands that ladies display certain behavior to attract the opposite sex. Just like butterfly or birds display of their feathers, ladies through certain moves, attract men. Since we are not animals, the instincts to flirt and be attracted are controlled by morality, culture and laws in our communities. Beauty can transform into power for women to wield but men’s power of attraction is awesome, not a beauty.
No matter what we say, beauty is the first attraction that catches a man before other attributes. Or a lady may package certain endowment to catch attention. It may be a different calling for a matured woman but more important is the power to care for the family. That entails powerful command of a man’s environment as a leader. There are not many ladies who get attracted to a submissive man but many look for a man who knows when to leave his strong commanding qualities at the door when he gets home.
No culture has been able to deal with the morality involved in an explosive combination of beauty and power as well as the African polygamy or polyandry has. Both are based on the number of opposite sex, levirate or male offspring heir in the communities. It has nothing to do with sexual appetite, since most men lack the stamina to match a macho attitude they portray. Polygamy is common because men are more involved in risky adventures like wars and accidents reducing their numbers. So there are more beauties than the number of men in the general population and even fewer powerful men.
Any politician that does not smoke, drink or love women cannot be that much of a merry man, yet this Nigeria has produced such men. That type of man, people stay away from because he cannot be fun to deal with. Even then, these men do succumb to a beautiful wife that captures their hearts. In the writer’s part of the world, we find slang like “man pass man, position pass power”. Reference is also made to “bottom power” in terms of tempting power of women’s beauty.
Nobody takes a man who tries to be beautiful seriously. Too much attention to looks and hair style can give one the label of Edwards, the former Democrat US presidential candidate who managed to hide his love affair that produced a lovechild he denied. But it is a natural for a woman. Married women are advised to keep up their looks and never let go. Sagging eyebrow and wrinkles are kept at bay even in the old age complemented with different styles of clothes and pairs of shoes.
Cosmetics industries are booming, exercise diet gurus come from every profession. In view of the incessant austerity measures in Nigeria, ladies have not stopped looking good. Their hairstyles and head ties can cause neck pains for undisciplined heads. There is hardly any difference between African beauties and their counterparts all over the anywhere. We organize beauty pageants all over the world but not men pageants. Therefore, it is not surprising that younger ladies dress to kill.
If you have young men at home, instill the discipline of ladies etiquette and approach in them. Beauties are not for grabs. It is even harder to bring up teenage girls with all the norms of their generation and the culture of sweet sixteen. Men have to be restrained in their reaction to partially clad ladies to avoid landing in jail. Actually, men are better off admiring beauties from a distance. The distinction between invitation for coffee at a lady’s apartment and a date rape may have to be sorted out in court.
Many of the men who are late bloomers took their studies and work seriously excelling in their endeavors. The problem is those that have never been kissed in school. On their way to acquiring power at work, beauties fling all over them. It becomes a debatable issue in their minds who to choose and who to marry. Of course most men do not marry their first date, like most women. By the time religion and culture is taken into account, relationship between powerful men and beautiful ladies becomes more complicated.
There is that particular lady or man that your mother likes from her gut feelings and that your father likes because she conforms to certain religion and culture. It may and may not be your choice. Needless to say, some foolish mistakes by a partner can send your glare beyond family home. But note that it is 18 years sentence without parole, if the lovechild decides to go to college, you may be responsible until she or he is 24.
