Date Published: 03/04/10

My Encounter With A Distinguished Senator By Bayo Ogundipe

An aeroplane, a giant noisy bird that can easily close the gap between two cities miles apart.

This day, I found myself in an urgent assignment inside the craft enroute Heathrow. Unlike land travel where you acquaint yourself with the places you pass through, the plane leaves that benefit only with the pilot. So most times I find myself sleeping inside the air bus and only waking up shortly before my arrival at my destination. On this occasion my company had recently acquired the nod to supply the water treatment chemical at a private water company in Lagos, and I was mandated to do the necessary follow - up in London.

Sitting beside a man (especially an elderly one) could be a lot more boring at times. But there was something about this particular man who kept coughing and sighing beside me.

Good evening sir, I am Bayo Ogundipe,” I said, nodding politely. He smiled back as if in unbelief, and then he took  a closer look at me. It appears that action cleared all doubts from his mind. He smiled now more relaxed and comfortable, and went on to add its nice meeting you and I’m Senator…”(I cut in) ah sir you need no introduction, are you not Senator Udoedeghe? Of late we have been reading about you in the media and I must confess I’m really happy to meet you.” His composure and simplicity made me to wonder if this was the same man I have heard stories about. After exchanging pleasantries for a while we fell apart, as I attempted a nap.

It appeared he was not comfortable as he kept muttering and sighing at the same time. And so I carefully decided to tell him what politicians like to hear.  Sir you are really a great man, and your people must be proud of you.”

My brother, you people in Lagos are always very intimidatingly nice to strangers, I hope I’m safe o”, he smiled again.

I wanted to ask him his opinion on the current situation in the country and the decision of the national assembly to act ‘out of necessity’ during the absence of oga kpatapata. But he interrupted me and quickly quipped na whoa! “I have this problem that has refused to leave me”, he started. “Excuse me sir are you talking to me? I was not sure that this distinguished man with his aura could be telling me that he has a problem when he…

“Let me tell you the story of my life,” he quipped. “As I said, there is this ‘Satan’ that has been disturbing me since my childhood. I remember that my parents at a point grew tired of shouting at me because it was to no avail.

You know from a background where there was enough money to eat and wine, and a father who hardly stays at home, I was already a spoilt brat in primary four.”

At that point I knew he was about giving me a story that could make hit for any newspaper.

“You know my father owned a big driving school and was also involved in the transportation business. We were generally renowned as children born with silver spoons (chuckles) and we were sent to the best schools in the land. I was the youngest yet more troublesome in our household.  My father (bless his soul) was always busy and that left the duty of looking after us my mum’s major task.

I was never in school, and I never repeated a class. You see with money to flaunt around, it was easy to have friends who could protect my interest in the class. They did my assignments, they wrote test for me and my teachers were equally not willing to get my dad angry. So I had a field day through primary school.”

(… hmm this was getting interesting) “But sir you said you had older ones, did they not react to your escapades?” Far from it, I was called idiok udo(prodigal son), because of this satan that kept distracting me. And at a point all my siblings decided to let me be for peace sake.

Secondary school days were my most memorable ones. At first they thought that I will never make it because of my truancy, and nonchalance attitude. But the fear of my physical stature and the crowd of supporters around me always saw me scale the hurdles. At some points, the satan in me will come back and I will behave so abnormally. For instance, from my JSS 3, there was hardly a day I did not go home with a different girl. You needed to see the competition and rivalry that this generated in my school. Also among my scorecard were the various accounts of my fights. There was none who dared me or any of my girls. At times people hired me to fight on their behalf and I was really a warrior. Those who dreaded me most were my teachers and seniors. Out of desperation, they frequently reported my activities or inactivities to my parents, usually my mum.  

As I am, I can’t recount how many times I took money from my parents without their consent, and I even sold my dad’s wrist watch to attend a flamboyant party.

My mum was always shouting and rebuking me for all my excesses. I did not care. I remember people telling her that she should not kill herself; after all I was a man.  But one day when she could not bear it any longer, she called my father and reported me instantly. The old man was more concerned about his business and decided the matter with kid’s glove. He lost it and mama decided to fire on, that was the only day my dad ever beat me. He called me into his room and with my mum sulking in a corner he scolded me and warned me to desist from my ignoble activities. He told me that I should take a cue from my elder brothers who were living very responsibly. Even as he flogged me, I could see that from the grin on his face, he was somewhat please with me.

Somehow that satan returned, and lured me into business at the expense of furthering my education. I became interested in my father’s businesses especially the transport sector. Before long, I had my own buses and drivers, even as cash started flowing into my account.

But after your Secondary education, didn’t you further your studies?” I inquired.

Well for more than 17 years, I got involved in the businesses at the motor park and I dare say the temptation of making money was too strong that I could not afford to lose any time in exploring my opportunities. See I am not discrediting the importance of education, but somehow, without it I was still making it. But my party decided to introduce the university degree as a criterion for contesting election and I had to drag myself to the University of Calabar.

“But how were you able to succeed in political offices if your party insisted on University education?”

(casting suspicious look) At a time education was not a pre-requisite. Because of my connections with the tough guys coupled with my dad’s antecedents, I successfully won as the Chairman of my local government during the military era. To me that was the height of my achievement and we celebrated my ascension in style.   

“But sir, (I cut in, clearly wishing to shorten his lengthy narrative) how is your relationship with Governor Akpabio, people are…”

No No No, wait I’m coming, we will get just there. You see when I decided to contest for the senate seat, few people gave me a chance. They came with all sorts of allegations that would have made me unpopular. But again with my popularity among the boys, we were able to wriggle out and I scaled with the PDP ticket. At the senate, the devil came around again and I decided to kick against the then Governor Victor Attah.

 That time, the Governor was not in the good books of former President Olusegun Obasanjo. I thought I could gain the president’s favour if I antagonize Attah, but even then, it did not work and I could not even get the second term for the senate. Afterwards I came back into oblivion and for almost four years I could hardly create an impact in the system. But I saw my chance after Akpabio clinged the PDP ticket of the governorship primaries. When I went to the campaign team, I threaten them brimstone and they could not help but give the position of campaign manager. I also told them that they must give the position of federal minister, which they accepted.

It went on smoothly but I was not allowed to stay long in the federal executive council, and I was dropped as minister.

But do you think Governor Akpabio was responsible in the decision by Yar’Adua to drop you from his cabinet when he nominated you in the first place?

(Soberly) “I know he was not responsible, and I know that it is that same Satan that came over me, making me to antagonize my substantive minister. Our quarrel led to nowhere and we both faced the music of being booted from office. So that was when I decided to come home and heap the blame on Akpabio, thinking that it would compel him to find me a juicy contract; especially to help me acquire that ceramic factory in Itu. Till date, I cannot believe that Akpabio could refuse me that request, and I decided to launch an attack. Let me tell you, if you don’t make yourself relevant in the system, nobody will recognize you. And for me, I can’ t bear the thought of going back home to stay idle for another six to seven years.

Let me tell you young man, in that our State, if you don’t fight yourself into relevance, you may wait endlessly and die of hunger. If I had not done it in 2006, I know I would not have been a minister.

That was why I decided to adopt this strategy, by campaigning against him for the 2011 governorship elections. As at now, it is getting more difficult for me, and even most of the boys we paid to do the dirty jobs and blackmail the governor have been caught, and are singing in police net. I’m not sure I know how much longer we can hang just on, but I wish I had listen and I don’t know just what to do again…”(he began sobbing again)

“But have you contemplated apologizing to the Governor, especially for all the lies you’ve peddled against him?” I asked again, and it was then I saw the venom in his now extremely red eyes as he made for my throat.

You, (grabbing my neck) who sent you and how dare you take sides?

Leave me alone (I shouted now surprised that no one else was anywhere near us in the plane), help heeelp, heeeeeeeeeelp!

“Sweet heart wake up, you are really hot from this fever”, it was my wife, waking me from my daymare and reminding me that the family doctor that I sent for, had just arrived.

Bayo wrote in from Lagos